Trump Mocks Biden For Using Brakes To Avoid Crashing Into Brick Wall

bidentrumpdebate

WASHINGTON, D.C.—Accusing his opponent of going over the top with safety precautions, President Trump criticized Joe Biden Wednesday morning for using brakes to avoid crashing into hard concrete surfaces.

“This guy uses brakes every chance he gets. It’s almost like he’s afraid of plowing straight into a brick wall at 75 miles per hour or something. What a wimp,” Trump told reporters, pointing out that real men drive straight through four-way stops at crowded elementary schools.

“Oh, give me a break. Every time I see this guy, he’s using his blinker to merge into the next lane. I can’t even count how many times this loser has worn a seatbelt. Everybody knows that airbags are just a left wing, deep state conspiracy to make me look bad in the polls,” the 45th president went on.

Trump later speculated that Biden “probably uses a parachute when he skydives, too.”

Update 10/21/20 9:52am: Directly after tweeting car crashes are a hoax, the president was reportedly involved in a five-car pileup on Pennsylvania Avenue.

Read More: Trump Strikes Deal To Rebuild Country’s Broken Glass Ceiling

Read More: Marianne Williamson Admits Nation Not Ready For President Who Can Cast Blood Magic

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s